Action and Reaction, or Newton's Third Law

The past few days have been largely a blur, emotionally, for me. I do want to, again, thank everyone who has offered congratulations.

You wouldn't think that a simple answer would make your life more complex, would you? Although, granted, it's not a simple question, not ever.

Disbelief, shock, a little fear, a lot of "what do I do now?", a lot of "what should I feel now?". It's really amazing at how many hoops our hearts can jump through, even for something we've been long expecting, anticipating, hoping, and praying for.

But...

But I can't look at the ring on my finger without smiling. I keep wanting to show it to people...not to show off...not to brag, or boast, or anything...just to say "I'm happy. I'm so happy. Aren't you happy that I'm happy?"

Does that make sense?

The ring is so much more than diamond and white gold. It would be special to me if it were only cubic zirconia and cheap sterling silver. It is so beautiful, the way it shines, reflects the light, breaks it into pieces, bursts into fire.

It feels so odd on my hand, given that I've never been much for wearing rings before, as a chemist. But I don't want to take it off, and when I have to (in lab) I put it on the chain around my neck. I plan to buy a separate chain for it. It feels so *right*, so natural there, like it's a part of me, like my heart, which is his. Always, love, always.

I'm so happy.

Scared, yes. Definitely scared. Unsure. I hate being unsure, you know that, if you know me. But I can't stop smiling. Or being happy. Whatever happens, I know I made the right decision. I would make it again at the drop of a hat.

Up until he left, yesterday, he would look at me at odd times and ask me again and again "Marry me." And I would say "Yes."

Yes. Yes. Yes. Always and forever, yes.